OK, now wait! Before you get mad at me for substituting a more provocative title than Hitachi Backhoe (which, now that I think about it, could be considered even more suggestive), let me explain. I was looking up Hitachi on the internet (where else? I think the World Book Encyclopedia is now defunct) for a title prompt and found out Hitachi is a highly diversified company that operates eleven business segments.Take my word for it, the list is terribly boring. But I did find out that you can purchase the Hitachi Magic Wand Massager through Amazon. And, at the time of this writing, if you want it by Wednesday, July 9, you should order within 5 hours 54 mins and choose Two-Day Shipping at checkout. The details are as follows:

• 1 yr warranty
• 2 powerful speeds, low 5000 rpm, high 6000 rpm
• Most popular massager for over 30 years
• Non phallic appearance
• Electric for constant, powerful vibration

(No remuneration was offered by the Hitachi corporation or accepted by myself for consideration!)

(Please be sure to check out Photos By Emilio when you get the chance. They have color there!)